when to leave negative feedback?

[TreasureCoastTrader]

I bought jewelry supplies from an Etsy shop-I ordered pretty earring hooks-when I received them they look nice but the hook is so thick I tried them on and can't fit the hook through the hole in my ear! I wear earrings all the time-and have worn some post earrings that were kind of tight but these are impossible.
I got about 12 items and gave positive feedback and nice remarks but on those I gave neutral and stated they were 'pretty but the wires are thick' the seller contacted me and asked (begged) me to change the feedback rating-I felt it wasn't important enough to get her upset so I changed to positive-now I'm conflicted because I wouldn't have bought them if someone else had commented they were too thick...just so I know for the future-is the neutral rating reserved for really bad service-was a right or wrong to leave neutral?
PS she never offered for me to return them-I HATE ORDERING FROM OUT OF THE COUNTRY!!! but that's another issue :)

[LoveJewelryByJ]

maybe you should have asked her to return them? I would reserve negative feedback for when there is no resolution to a conflict or a truly inferior product.

Maybe I wouldn't have given them a positive unless they offered to accept the return - i say convo them and ask them if they would take it back and if they don't keep a neutral feedback. If they do, i would say that the wires were too thick and leave a positive

[KriyaDesign]

Honestly I never leave negative or neutral feedback. My reasoning is.... not everyone would agree... I don't know the business or the person behind it. For me to assume they purposely give bad service is a pure conjecture on my part. And the thought that my words might make their reputation questionable doesn't sit well with me. Like I said, I don't know them so I would rather not point finger.

I would personally contact the seller and state my concerns and take it from there. 99% of the suppliers I deal with have top notch customer care. They always work with me... kindly. Of course I always do my research before I choose any suppliers. I do err sometimes but that's the reason I put in smaller, first order. To see if the supplier is a good match to my store. If they are not, I simply scratch them off the list. No hard feelings.

This seem to work for me. But I know some who think they need to warn the public of a business not so stellar service. I'd say there is not right or wrong way of doing thing. If its work for you... go for it

[Former_Member]

I make earrings and that is something I have noticed. Some of the ear wires are very dramatic out there and beautiful to look at. But if you go thicker than an 18 gauge wire there is no way it will get through most peoples ear holes. I actually prefer to use 20 gauge. They look more delicate. But what is the point of buying them if you can't wear them. I have brought this subject up on another forum but got no response. So buyer beware, good question to ask the seller when purchasing earrings!

[sherischart]

You have just taught me something about jewelry. Thanks I will have to remember that because I couldn't wear thick 20 gauge either.
If there is any feedback I like to convo personally. And especially leave positive feedback for the shop to see . I'm like Kriya--personally contact the seller.
I purchased the wrong customized iphone case. Who's fault is it that ? In all the communications it was never asked what model? Lovely design and wonderful product . And the gift will never be used. Politely and personally contacted the seller and it was an attitude like "sorry" that's too bad. I went ahead and gave her a positive. But...I'll have to see if the listing ever changed to please specify what size, model , etc. for correct sizing.

[CrazieHappy]

I've struggled with this question too. I gave a seller negative feedback when I was new on Etsy and I didn't understand the process - then she gave ME revenge negative feedback! Which is the only negative I have. bummer. I didn't understand about Kiss and Make Up or anything.
recently I gave someone neutral feedback because the item took way too long to arrive. I just couldn't honestly give positive feedback. Haven't heard anything back about that.

[WolfandFirefly]

I agree with Janelle. Ask to return them, and if they refuse, then a neutral or negative feedback would be appropriate in my opinion. First be sure that the listing didn't include the information about the gauge of wire though. If they accept the return, I would leave a positive, stating that the wire was too thick for my ears.

[WolfandFirefly]

@Sheri, To clarify ...20 gauge is the normal thickness for ear wires I think. It is thinner than 18 gauge. The larger the number, the thinner the wire. :)

[Former_Member]

You are a shopper. You paid YOUR money for an item that you THOUGHT you wanted. By the fault of the seller - either through their lack of thorough description or misleading photos - convinced you that you wanted to buy an item. When you received it, and were displeased with what you bought - you DEFINITELY should just return it.

It is a hassle, but hey - you paid good money for it, right? You should be pleased with your purchase.

I find it absolutely GALLING that someone would beg you to change your feedback, when it was absolutely dead on accurate. You weren't happy with the what you got or how she dealt with it, she deserves the neutral feedback IMO! That's really bad form - to ask someone to change it! Very rude, in my opinion.

[Former_Member]

Hi Sheri
Just to clarify a point about wire gauges. The smaller the number the thicker the gauge. 20 gauge will fit everyone. 18 starts getting pretty thick, and 16 is impossible. The thicker ones look really great in the pics but they will probably be spending more time in your jewelry box than on your ears.

[TreasureCoastTrader]

thank you all for comments and suggestions-in the future I will ask the gauge before I buy-the earrings are at least 18 g...if it were a post it would be manageable but it's a fish hook with a sharp curve whach makes it so I can't use-I guess for people with large holes it wouldn't matter-but I need to be sure it fits most- (I'll sell them and be sure to comment on the thickness) I won't send them back because I ordered from Korea and it would cost more to send back then I spent.
LIVE AND LEARN
With the high cost of metals-I suppose it's going to be an issue-I bought other earring wires (outside Etsy) that were so tiny and thin when I got them they look like they're made for small children!
On top of it all I feel unpatriotic not buying American but what are our options here? They sell product so cheaply and then not charge shipping-I'm paying about 2/3 less than US competitors (for some products) before shipping! Something needs to change

[Former_Member]

Carolee - Did they say what gauge it was on the listing? Or did it just not say anything? If I were a seller - that would be a grave mistake - to omit the measurements of the earwires that I was trying to sell. It's a pretty critical piece of information, and in your case, it made the transaction not really work out for you, since you did not get what you thought you were getting.

[Former_Member]

I just learned that a neutral does not mean neutral! I was just sent a Kiss and make up for a item that I bought that I really liked, yet in the construction of it, I could tell that the seller didn't take the time to fine tune the details so instead of returning it, I just fixed it. But I did leave a neutral response for it. So getting the kiss and make up made me realize that the seller Assumed that I didn't like it. That I was upset. No, I wasn't upset, I just wasn't thrilled with the construction but I knew how to fix it.
I didn't state why I gave a neutral response so I really don't see why it was taken as a negative response. Geez...
I'm still new to this stuff and have learned...I ended up giving the seller a positive and stated how I love the item still (but not that I fixed them).
I also learned to read the fine print when thinking of purchasing and to really examine the item. (I happened to be looking at the item I purchased at night on my iphone. Buy in the light on a big screen! LOL!)
P.S. It drives me nuts when I get ear wire that are that thick!!

[QuirkyUniverse]

I feel like you're doing other buyers a disservice when you're not honest in your feedback.

[Former_Member]

I agree with Lori. I do think it was unprofessional of her to beg you to change the feedback. You went with your instinct, and as sellers I don't think it's our place to "dictate" what feedback customers should leave us. That would just turn me off from buying from her again.

[Former_Member]

Totally agreed. It is one thing to contact the buyer and ask why they were displeased, and if there is ANYTHING you can do as a seller to help improve their experience.

Just ASKING someone to change their opinion because itll hurt your reputation? Awful!

That's what I call "Bad form"

[Former_Member]

Neutral feedback doesn't affect the rating percentage - I would have left them as neutral, especially since she didn't offer to let you return them.

[AllieBlankets]

I have left neutral feedback before, and the seller freaked out as well. The item I got was great,but she had made it seem much bigger in the photos (the item she used to compare was clear). I left neutral feedback due to this. She asked me to kiss and make up. It would take a lot for me to leave negative! But I feel like we should be able to be honest with our feedback. That is what it is for after all. Plus the sellers will learn where to improve with our honesty. I hate the fear of negative feedback here!

[2TrickPony]

to the original question:
do give the seller a chance to fix something before leaving feedback.

[Beaderbeads]

I would contact them before I leave any negative or neutral feedback. Try to resolve problem, ask for a refund. Give them time to respond. Shame on that seller for not offering you some sort of fix.
Sorry you had that experience.
I myself have a 14 day return policy in my bead shop. I think most sellers have return policies.

[CatherineMarissa]

I would leave negative only if I was extremely displeased with the product and service...and the seller made no effort to improve the situation.

Neutral is just that -- neither pleased nor displeased. It is important if products are misrepresented or if service is poor. It doesn't affect the seller's rating, but can be of use to future buyers.

[Former_Member]

I would have left a neutral, I think. I would only reserve negatives for truly negative experiences. I mean the kind that you really can't resolve despite trying because the seller shuts you out or ignores you.

I don't really understand why she wouldn't have asked for them back and delivered a refund. And honestly, since you tried them (naturally), she can't sell them, so I would have probably just said keep them and would send you a refund.