How do I attract my focus group?

I was wondering .....Does my title and discription seem compeling? Does it speak to what I represent? Am I using the correct key phrases? Help Please.
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Former_Member
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Re: How do I attract my focus group?

Just a quick look at your pictures and your banner--

In my opinion, they are too busy. Your banner is good, and reflects what you sell. I like the "vintage made new". I don't like, "we make your dreams come true". I think it is over used and doesn't reflect what you do. It adds words and clutters your banner.

Your pieces are beautiful, and the pictures are pretty, but when I look at the pictures, I have to look hard to see what you are selling. I would get rid of the extras and focus on taking great pictures of just your jewelry.
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